My first church. I worked more hours there than any other church. Every meeting. Every hospital visit. Every Sunday. I\u2019d like to say this was because I loved God, but it had more to do with loving the approval of others. The hard work was about my insecurity and my belief that if I exceeded everybody\u2019s expectations\u2014people would like me and accept me.<\/p>\n
I don\u2019t struggle with this anymore, except most days. I can think of no worse body of water to swim in than the sea of constantly laboring to meet other people\u2019s expectations. People slowly and painfully drown in that sea every day. Here are three reasons why swimming in this sea is a really bad idea.<\/p>\n
You simply aren\u2019t going to be able to please some people no matter how good you are or how hard you try. Expectations aren\u2019t always clear. Some are unrealistic. Or they change. And many people, even if their expectation is met, still aren\u2019t going to be happy with you because they aren\u2019t happy with themselves.<\/p>\n
If you live for somebody\u2019s acceptance you may die from their rejection. Basing your self-worth on an imperfect person\u2019s perception of you will mess you up. Stop doing that. It leads to a life of anxiety and being busy with duties you aren\u2019t too thrilled about.<\/p>\n
\u00a0<\/strong>People pleasing puts you in the position of feeling powerless to say \u201cno\u201d and then being frustrated when you say \u201cyes\u201d. Constantly attempting to meet other people\u2019s expectation turns you in their creation. Perhaps life\u2019s most painful moment is the moment when you realize you have lost yourself and regret a future you will never have.<\/p>\n Look for better places to swim. Find your own pond, river, lake, or ocean filled with waters of authenticity, growth, and grace. Here are three things you can do to get started today.<\/p>\n It is not possible to please everybody all the time. Don\u2019t spend your days failing at something you shouldn\u2019t be doing anyway. Memorize, own, and live this phrase: \u201cI can\u2019t please everybody all the time and I\u2019m cool with that.\u201d<\/p>\n Saying \u201cno\u201d isn\u2019t selfish. Saying \u201cno\u201d just means you have good boundaries. \u201cNo.\u201d is a complete sentence. You have no obligation to explain a darn thing to anybody.Learn to say \u201cno\u201d and feel good\u2014not guilty.<\/p>\n Being consumed with what others think about you is quickest and most effective way to disregard what God believes about you. Being consumed with what God believes about you is the quickest and most effective way to disregard what others think about you. And God believes you are great!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" My first church. I worked more hours there than any other church. Every meeting. Every hospital visit. Every Sunday. I\u2019d like to say this was because I loved God, but it had more to do with loving the approval of…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":1787,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[73],"tags":[200,206,194,204,205,110],"class_list":["post-1786","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-spiritual-formation","tag-acceptance","tag-boundaries","tag-dreams","tag-expectations","tag-no","tag-people-pleasing"],"yoast_head":"\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\t\n\t\n\n\n\t\n\n
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